There are somethings that can't be unsaid or unseen. And then there are times that I think I have gone too far. This happened a while ago and I thought, "Hmmmmm, should I post it or would it be going too much?" So I decided at the time that it was too much even for me. And then I rethunk it. And decided, "What the Hell, jail sounds wonderful!"
I have said so many times that I am a terrible mom. I have no couth. Everyone knows this and I hope that the parole board will take pity on me.
My lovely Mother in law and I went on a little shopping trip to see if we could find a few bargains. We started at her house and then made our way around a few towns. DJ was off for the day and didn't want to join the "girls" for a fun filled day of shopping and lunch.
Half way through our little jaunt, I called him and told him to do his chores, pick up his room and take a shower. Nothing too hard but oh how that would all come back to haunt me.
We ended up near my house on our little trek and I said I wanted to stop by the house. And for the life of me, I can't remember what I wanted to stop for. But soon you will understand why I lost that memory.
I asked my Mother in law if she wanted to come in with me, she said no. Which is unusual because she always wants to see the grand kids, if even for a second. But she stayed in the car. God was with her on that day.
God, on the other hand, had completely forsaken me. I ran into the house to grab "whatever" cuz I still have no memory of it. (Please remember we live in a very open tri-level) When I walked into the house, I thought that it was weird that the house was "steamy" and I could hear the shower running. Hmmmmm, that's a bit odd I thought as I walked around and looked up the stairs into the hall. And then my son walked into the hall butt naked. I guess when I'm not home, he likes to walk from his room to the bathroom in the nude. And he also like the bathroom to resemble a sauna.
Both of our eyes almost popped out of our heads as we both realized that I had just seen his junk. This would be the point that I realized he was in desperate need of some undercarriage maintenance. He needed like sheep shears or something.
The conversation went something like this(Please remember that it was being screamed in pure horror)-
DJ-WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?
Sonya-DEAR GOD, I LIVE HERE!
Sonya-HOLY SHIT, I JUST SAW YOUR JUNK!
DJ-OH MY GOD!
We haven't been alright for a while. I did try to make it better. DJ told Anna about our debacle and I said that something have changed since I "saw" you last. And that little statement made it worse.
I also, tried to get his father to talk to him about undercarriage grooming. I was told by his father that no grooming is needed. To which I answered, you didn't see what I saw. It was like one years worth of floor clippings from Great Clips stuck to him.
Another parenting misstep,