Monday, June 20, 2011
When Karma Catches Your Ass
I am not a zen master but on occasion the universe will give the average person clues, when that happens you should listen. Me, on the other hand, not so much. If you have been warned and don't listen-suffer stupid ass. I am stupid ass.
DJ is going to England in a few short weeks. I am very glad for him but also very worried. It's my job as mom. So here was my train of thought-I will miss him but it will be a nice break-I hope that he bathes and brushes his teeth-I hope that he uses his best manners-I hope that he doesn't get sick-I hope that he doesn't have an allergic reaction(because I'm sure no one in England has ever had to treat this before)-OH GOD and now I have to worry even more.
And, as you all know, I fancy myself a witch doctor of sorts and decided to experiment on him before he left. Our PCP said that Claritin should prevent all reactions. SHOULD. I kept that little bit of information in the back of my head for some time now. I know what you are thinking, I should have been giving him these pills for years. Getting him to bathe is a horrendous fight, taking pills every day would be impossible. I did try for a while but then he worried about the side effects. Yes, his self preservation reflex is in tact. He is basically an 80 year old man and has been like this since he was 3. He also, only has a reaction every few years and I have been able to get all but 2 under control, which is amazing. Refer back to the witch doctor.
So to be fair to the English folk, I loaded the boy up on Claritin and handed him a red Popsicle. He fought me at first but then gave in because I wouldn't leave him alone. After he ate most of it, it sunk in about what I had just done. He had eaten enough to about kill him and then I started to have second thoughts. I then decided that it would be a good idea to give him Benadryl. I lost my nerve. He on the other hand, was so pissed at me that he actually said to his loving mother, "Hell no! We are in this now!" The nerve!
It was an awful few hours but nothing happened. I was so relieved. Not only because I didn't force feed him death but because he would be safe in England. He even seemed happy. I'm not sure if it was because he lived or because we finally had something to prevent it.
Right about now you are thinking what does this have to do with Karma. Exactly! Fast forward a few days, he had a terrible reaction for no apparent reason. It was a really bad one. We were lucky that I got it under control as fast as I did and he didn't puke out his nose. Karma just isn't going to let me get away with poisoning him without a reaction even if it is very delayed. So now he is taking Claritin everyday, he even decided that it was a good idea.
Smile that this isn't your life,