Tuesday, July 10, 2012

I Like Freaky Shit

I'm a freak, what can I say? I'm really into branding. I mean who could argue that branding during sex makes it so much better. Right, right? OK maybe that isn't exactly how it happened. I may have been cooking every food known to man for the 4th and grabbed a searing lid and melted my finger print off of my thumb. Yeah, that sounds more like it. But for a moment, I sounded like fun.
Now to bring Anna into the story to sound even more like a pervert. Six Flags has a tanning lotion/sun block sponsor. Not to say that they suck but they suck. The life guards get all the free lotion they want while they are working. It's free crap.(Walmart sells this generic brand that is a water-proof spray-on and is like 50 SPF. It lasts all day and does a great job. Go figure.) So needless to say Anna was burnt to a crisp after two days of using the free junk. I had read somewhere that rubbing wet tea bags on a burn would help. So she soaked in the tub with a bunch of tea bags and some oatmeal. I knew that oatmeal would help pull the burn out too. She was almost completely better by the next morning.. It was a miracle. Really, it was. She burns terrible and it usually lasts for a few days but she was just a little pink on the shoulders the next morning. The tub did not fair as well and spent some quality time with a bit of bleach.
Anywho, when I branded burned my finger print off I reached for a tea bag. I ran it under some cold water and then held it on my thumb. Five minutes and there was no pain. I was free to go back to cooking and do it all over again.
And who would have thought that I go from branding to Anna to a helpful hint all in one post?
The Wild Woman

12 comments:

Mamma has spoken said...

Happy to hear that the tea bags took the pain away but I can't help but wonder if she looked less burnt due to being tea stained :o/ Hehehe, she's been tea stained like what you do to get the antique look :o)

Jenny Woolf said...

Yes is your finger brown now? But actually thanks for that. I will try it. Not that there is the slightest chance of anyone burning hereabouts unless they sit on the iron or similar

Annie said...

Shane chewed on used (wet) tea bags when he had his wisdom teeth out. They worked wonders on the pain and healing process.

Sonya Ann said...

Mamma has spoken-HAHAHA, I'm going to tell her that she has the antique look!

Sonya Ann said...

Jenny Woolf-We are constantly trying to set fire to ourselves. It's a gift really.

Sonya Ann said...

Annie-Is there anything they can't do?

McVal said...

Wow! If it didn't talk about freak sex so much, I'd show this to my daughter who thought I was nuts when I suggested tea bags!!! And say, SEE?! SEE?!

Frances said...

I was really looking forward to the freaky sex, but I guess a helpful hint will have to do me.

slugmama said...

Tannic acid(in tea)was used to treat soldiers in WWI after gas attacks. It's been used medicinally since the 1800's.

And here I thought you were going someplace totally different with the tea bagging reference.....!lol

Sonya Ann said...

McVal-Yeah, lets just save her from me. It's really in everyone's best interest.

Sonya Ann said...

Frances-Hahaha, its amazing that everyone lets me get away with as much as I do.

Sonya Ann said...

sluggy-I was wondering if anyone was going to mention that! Bad girl!