Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Giraffe Love and Gambling

This is a bad picture so lets just blame the crazy overhead lighting and not the photographer.
My life has been a crazy whirlwind of activity. Anna and Scott came in for a visit and stayed over a week. They now live in Denver. Scott has a job at a health club and Anna thinks she has a lead on something. They are trying to find teaching jobs but are taking anything that they can get at this point to have some money coming in. Whatever, the bank of mom is closed, well except for gas money so they can leave.
I kept snapping pictures and I think that I caught how Scott really felt. He is a good sport and can take a hell of a lot of shit our humor.


My sister-in-law, brother-in-law and nephews also came in for a visit. And all the boys wanted to do was to try and kill/torture sit on DJ's lap. For some reason, it seems that DJ was shaking the children in a few pictures.
It seems to help them smile though.
Again, I think DJ should not be left in charge of the boys. Notice how happy DJ seems.
It somehow works with them though.
We managed to get a group shot of the family but it seems that there are a few of us in the back that looked like we are being interrogated or are going to be beamed up to the mothership. Oh well, we tried.
Anna and Scott headed back to Denver and then Den, DJ, Me, and DJ's best friend Jordan, plus my inlaws and my SIL and BIL and boys headed to the WI Dells. The men folk went to a golf outing. DJ and Jordan went to Mount Olympus and Cindy, Donna, Justin and Andrew and myself went and hung out downtown most of the day. 
The boys went prospecting. Let me tell you, if you ever want to start up a business this is the rack to get into. It was $15 a bucket of sand!!! And  that was the low end!!! It went up to $135 for a bucket!!!!! Each of the boys ended up with a few little worthless shards bits of rocks. For $15, I thought that we should have gotten to keep the bucket and all the sand too. But I'm cheap and I have to keep telling myself that its just for the experience of it.
I held Andrew a lot during the trip. I forgot how wonderful it was to be loved by a little one. I also forgot how dirty they are. The little stinker would just wipe his dirty hands on me. I realize that I'm so far out of practice with little ones.
We then rode a mini train through a zoo sort of scam. I again was lucky that Andrew decided I was his buddy. He is pretty brave for a 3 year old until..........................

Of course, the biggest of the bunch decided that he wanted to stick his head in Andrew's lap and try to eat his $4 cup of carrots. We survived after I told the scared kid not to freak out because I'm not sure what the animal was going to do. I threw a few carrots like the ninja Aunt that I am and freed us.
Then it was on to the giraffes. I'm a fun Aunt. And there is where the problems started. You could "kiss" the giraffes. Andrew was so brave and wanted to try it. As you can see, I'm holding his hand against his chest. I was a bit worried he would freak out and punch the giraffe. I'm a badass ninja Aunt but I don't think that I could win that fight.
Then my adorable little nephew asked me to "kiss" the giraffe. I mean how do you say no. Thank God there isn't a picture of it but some freaky giraffe pushed the other gentle and polite kisser out of the way and shoved his tongue in my mouth and then up my nose. Yeah, I can now say that I made out with a giraffe. Unfortunately my SIL saw it all and I have been the butt of many jokes. Like, once you go giraffe you never go back. Damn it. But at least I got his name, I made out with Eddie.
After the sexual assault, we went go-carting. My nephews are adorable little speed demons. I think they get that from me.
We left the casino down but I did hit for $57 on my beloved John Wayne game. I cashed it out and paid for our dinner at the buffet. It tasted like winning, people. The woman sitting 2 machines down from me hit for $3000+ after 3 spins. A day late and a dollar short!

On our way back from the Dells, we stopped in Madison WI at the casino. You only have to be 18 to gamble there so I thought that it would be a nice way to end our trip, the boys gambling for the first time. We gave them money and thought this would be awesome for them.
This was right before their first bet. And that was the last time that they smiled. Maybe it was because of the creeper checking my son out or perhaps they don't do well losing money.
We didn't stay long. DJ lost $25 and Jordan lost $35 and I thought that they were going to have a meltdown. I guess neither will be wanted by the mob for gambling debts anytime soon. DJ especially was not a happy boy. He stood over me glaring at me, telling me how stupid it was to gamble and how he wanted to go. I sent him to his father and then we left. They really kill all the fun. And Den and I were both winning! The boy is not going to do anything to upset his fuddy-duddy ways. The kicker is they lost my money so I don't know why they were so mad!!!!
And that about catches you up on my life.
Bestiality,
Sonya Ann














16 comments:

Anne in the kitchen said...

Funny, funny, funny! I was drinking coffee and reading. The giraffe tongue may or may not have made me spew.
Now back to chores starting with wiping the computer screen.

Elephant's Child said...

Goodness you lead a busy life.
I am pretty certain that I have snogged a giraffe or two if your description of their technique is correct. 50 Shades of Orange come on down... which sounds dirtier than I meant. I think. As much as I do think at this hour of the morning.

Cheapchick said...

It is always good to have kids be broke at least once in their life - Anna will get her job life sorted soon enough and in the mean time Bank of Mom stay closed! Nice to see your kids though - looks like a fun family gathering. We now have yet another thing in common - I too have been french kissed by a camel - I was five at the time but it counts :)

Treaders said...

Eeeewwww yuck. I wouldn't fancy the camel AT ALL (not that I fancy the giraffe if you see what I mean). All that slobber. I did get slobbered on having my photo take on a glacier with a pyreneen mountain dog. Yuck. Still it was better than my ex when he had been drinking (or even when he was sober - which wasn't very often, come to think of it). You have a lovely family. Anna

Jill said...

Looks like a great time, cute pictures all around :-) Every time we go somewhere on vacation my husband always has to do the mining and find the gems, they never "grow" up, lol.

Janie Junebug said...

It's a good thing that shaking the kids didn't make them throw up. I would like to make out with a giraffe.

Love,
Janie

Sonya Ann said...

Anne in the kitchen-I would advise against kissing any sort of zoo animal. It wasn't all that it was cracked up to be.

Sonya Ann said...

Elephant's Child-Well then, we both have issues. After experiencing snogging with a giraffe, I'm done with the zoo.

Sonya Ann said...

Cheapchick-Hmmmmmmm, I never would have guessed that this would be a problem. I think that the camel might be worse than the giraffe. And it must have been upsetting if you remember it and you were only 5. I guess that means that I won't forget Eddie anytime soon.

Sonya Ann said...

Treaders-Your ex sounds like a mess. Maybe we should send Eddie to him. They sound like a perfect fit.
And thank you for thinking that my family is lovely, I think they are crazy but...........

Sonya Ann said...

Jill-That is cute that he still wants to mine. Does he buy the expensive bucket or does he stick with the cheapest one and just enjoy the experience?

Sonya Ann said...

Janie Junebug-The second that giraffe stuck his gray tongue in your mouth, you would retract that statement. Trust me.
Hey, as long as they don't throw up on me, all is good.

Jane said...

And here I thought DJ was always smiling! Swapping spit with a giraffe - now I've heard it all!

Frances said...

It's funny that the boys were so upset about losing YOUR money. Imagine if they had lost their own!

I have never wanted to make out with a giraffe. I am not as wild as you are. LOL!

Sonya Ann said...

Jane-That boy never smiles. Last night, I told him he was going to have to marry someone fun and carefree or would end up stressing out and having a heart attack. He actually snickered. He is soooooooooooooooo uptight for someone so young.

Sonya Ann said...

Frances-I think DJ would have been on the floor crying and kicking his feet. He is nothing like his sister. He said that he MIGHT try blackjack when he is 21 but we shall see.
And I live on the wild side. Yuck.