Tuesday, December 22, 2015

The Devil Drives

Well if that wasn't a mess of epic proportions!! Where to start, where to start!!?!
About a month back, I asked DJ if I was going to pick him up or if his roommates parents were going to get them for Christmas break. Him and his roomie(which I really like and feel bad for him at times, his fam is a bit of a mess. They love him but no one knows what is going on.) talked and his roomie said that I could choose which way. I said I would pick up since it was a Friday pickup and both parents work. Then about two weeks later, DJ said that his roomie's dad was getting them and I was driving back. Ok, fine. Then about a week later, DJ said that his roomie's mom was coming to get them Sat. Then Thursday, the mom backed out and I found out at about 6pm. So the dad was trying to get his sister to get them. So as I stood in the Dollar Tree, I lost it and said I'm leaving in the morning and I'll get you DJ. If the kid wants a ride, he is welcome, otherwise, they can try and find someone.
I left Friday morning at 10am. I got back at 11:15pm. I'm either a good mom or an idiot.
I told his roomie from here on out, I'm driving DJ. If he wants a ride, he is always welcome. This is the only way to deal with this. Not fair but at least, I know what is going on.
When I got into Muncie, we had to wait a bit for his roomie to pack but it was fine cuz I chilled on DJ's bed. Then I wanted food. A grouchy woman can only live on pork rinds, grapes, and beef jerky for so long. Whenever we are in Muncie, I make DJ drive. He knows where everything is. I drove Den's car since its a hybrid and we would save on gas. As DJ was driving, some idiot almost hit us. DJ handled it well and the catastrophe was averted. We were laughing that we would all just get out of the car, pick a direction and start a new life under an assumed name rather than face Den. He is a bit of a nut about his car. Right then, Den called. HE KNEW!!! He said there was a disturbance in the force.
After dinner, I drove the rest of the way home in heavy traffic. YUCK.
Den made cookies while we were gone. Not that I noticed, I went to bed as soon as I got home on Friday.
I woke up to a beautiful pile of oatmeal cookies.
There was also quite a mess that was waiting for me.
How do you not see this?!

Saturday was a bit of a blur. I was super tired and ended up napping for quite a few hours. It was either I was tired or ODed on the pork rinds but my mind and body weren't on the same page. My mind, kicked into overdrive while sleeping and I ended up having odd dreams. Needless to say, I had sex with the devil. Look, things happen. I know its wrong to dream-sex and tell, but I will recommend him. He is a biter. Look, I have no control of my mind while awake so asleep its like a free for all. I may have had dream-sex with J. Edgar Hoover too a while back. I wouldn't recommend him.
Sunday was much better, maybe dream-sex helped.
Our friends dropped off this damned cookie jar with cookies in it. My bestie Donna won it at my MIL's house on Christmas and abandoned him. Den and I felt the need to return it late one night last year, it was an awesome stealth mission. I have the feeling that they will be getting it back.
I think the cat is in training for a fight. He seems to have issues with Santa. I'm now at the point where I just watch the destruction. I eventually learned, I can't win.

Speaking of Santa................................
This was not the greatest year that I have had finding free money!!! I guess I should do what the woman at the liquor store was doing-panhandle and then use the money to buy scratch offs. Needless to say, we got liquor and a show on Sunday(How is it we go in to the liquor store for a $13 gift and spend $166. Den said it is because we are drunks and we buy alcohol for our friends that are drunks. Makes sense). Might I say, that Antioch's finest are hot as hell when they look pissed. Ok, I'm off track again.
Anywho, this is the 2015 tally.
$23.85    SavingStar cash deposit
$21.65    SavingStar Amazon gift code
$10         Swagbucks- Amazon gift code
$129        Pinecone Research
$91.25    BP
$10         Beer rebate
$24         Wine rebate
$25          MyPoints gift card-Macy's
$10          MyPoints gift card Panera
$20          MyPoints gift codes Amazon
$255.92   Points from Bank of America
For a total of $620.67
It looks like 2016 will be a much better year in the free money category. I have a lot of accounts that weren't quite ready to be cashed in so at the end of 2016 they will be ready. 
I forgot about this little trip from a while ago and I figured since this post makes no sense whatsoever I might as well add this. Remember how I was saying that you should look at your junk mail and emails during the Christmas season, well, I went shopping with all my coupons and an old gift card! I got $175.95 worth of stuff for $10.15 OOP. Well, $35.15 if you count the $25 Macy's gift card that was a present. The sad thing is I spent $8.37 on lunch.
And that's the mess that I have for you today!
Not dreaming,
Sonya Ann


SAM said...

Good read to start my day! I get the driving and relyibg on others-hated it! The cookie jar-gave me ideas for a few friends.

Meg B. said...

Very kind to help the roomie too. Lord knows how all this makes him feel! And, peace to you to go along with that goodwill. Merry Christmas.

slugmama said...

Letting DJ drive Den's car? Do you have a death wish???

You just need to move closer to DJ's school then the drive won't be so torturous.....well it will still be bad because of where it is but still. My drive to College Boy is just over 2 hours and quite relaxing at that, unless the weather is bad then it's a white knuckler and streaked panties drive.

Dream-sex with Satan. I'll pass. Maybe you should get Antioch's finest pissed then have dream-sex with them instead?

And just what you need.....MORE COOKIES! bwaaaaah
I use to have an ugly tin with Xmas geese on it I gifted back and forth with an old friend....funny stuff!

Practical Parsimony said...

LOL...from now on I will be looking to you for dream-sex recommendations.

I received a gift for my son's baby shower that had a blue bow with a hundred tiny gold safety pins on the bow. I returned it on a present for my friend's baby. Then, she returned it on a gift for my daughter. I don't remember where the bow is now. But, it was a fun tradition for a few years. Tes, we were having babies right and left for two years.

I don't blame you for just picking up your child. I would hate to deal with that indecision.

Cheryl said...

My drive to pick up our son is 8 hrs. without stopping at all. He goes to school near Lancaster and we always stop for lunch and to shop. The Sunday after Thanksgiving, it took us 12 hrs. with traffic and two accidents after one of the four tunnels we needed to drive thru. Fun times I tell you. Cheryl

Cheapchick said...

Holy Cow what a post. Sex with a demon??!!?? Cookies yes, cleaning up - I don't think most men are good at kitchen cleanup. I clean as I go when I cook. Hubby cooks and at the end there is a marathon cleaning session as he has used every pan/pot in the house. Oh well, I appreciate the effort he makes. It costs $25 for one 25 ounce bottle of hard liquor here so I am guessing you really stocked up there since liquor is way cheaper in the USA. I am envious. If I had a liquor cabinet we would be broke. Therefore we just buy one bottle at a time. You are a good Mom and picking DJ up is the right thing to do. I hate parents who don't have their shit together over simple things like that.

Janie Junebug said...

We bought a car for our daughter after she'd been in college a while. Then she could come and go as she pleased. We tried carpooling her freshman year of prep school. The two other kids were a nightmare. One of them had parents who lied about where they lived. He was much too far away to be in our carpool. It took an extra twenty minutes to get him home. His father drove like a maniac. We kicked them out of the carpool before the end of September. I put up with the other kid for the rest of the year. I'm surprised I didn't kill him. I don't think anyone would have sent me to prison. They would have thanked me. The following August his mom called me and said, I assume we'll carpool again. I said, No. He started the school year and was back at his easy peasy Christian school before the end of October. He didn't want to do the work required at a prep school. He was there to be on the fancy schmancy swim team that has produced a number of Olympians. He would lie to get out of practice. His heart wasn't in it. I think it was his parents' dream. Oh, well. I had the best time Saturday night. I usually don't drink, but I had a hard day (no dream sex with creepy creatures, though). Willy Dunne Wooters took me out to dinner. I had a very strong frozen strawberry margarita with a sugar rim. I felt much better. I said, I'm really toasted, but I wouldn't mind another one of these. Wooters said, Go ahead. I can sit here.

So I had another one. As we left the restaurant, I couldn't stop giggling. I think I told everyone in the place that I was drunk. I got over my difficult day and didn't even have a hangover.

If you can get a car for your son, I recommend it highly. It's so much easier than driving back and forth. Be sure to tell him that if he's stopped by the police, he should not allow them to search his car. Make them get a search warrant. I had a friend whose daughter got arrested during her freshman year in college because she accepted a ride from some other kids. One of them had pot in her purse. They got stopped for some small driving transgression. The dumb driver let the police search the car, and they were all arrested. My friend's daughter pleaded guilty because they told her she could leave if she did. She was so upset that she dropped out of school. What a shame. I told my daughter to keep her drugs at school.


P.S. I bet you thought I'd never shut up, but I'm going on and on because I have such happy memories of those margaritas.

Anne in the kitchen said...

We only have to pick up our son from the airport, since neither of us are going to make the drive from Alabama to Manhattan to have him home for a week. We did have son 1 and his family fly into Atlanta (about a 2 hour drive and 700 dollar savings) last night, unfortunately their flight was delayed by nearly 5 hours, so they finally got into Birmingham at 3 am. (Thanks and more thanks to Son2 and Son3 who left here at 10 pm to make the drive to get them.)

A near wreck, dream sex with demons and wandering cookie jars? Toss in a side of oatmeal cookies and you have the beginnings of a new dark novel.. Rosemary's Bakery?

Jane said...

Wow, my head hurts now and I'm yearning for a nap! But I'm afraid to fall asleep!!