Thursday, June 23, 2016

Flip A Driveway

I know that crazy crap happens to all of us but I really do feel like I get more than my share. Feel free to argue this with me and I will probably agree that some of you have more screwed up stories than I do. But have you almost totaled your van in your own driveway?
It was a normal day. I had some errands to run. I got in my trusty van, cranked the A/C and the radio and started to back up. We have a two car garage behind the house and the driveway is slightly crooked and is one lane when you get even with the side of the house. In order, to back out straight, you have to watch the driver's mirror. I have some friends that won't pull in our drive passed the house.
So I'm nice and cool, the radio is playin' my song and I'm watching my mirror as I start backing up. Done this thousands of times, mind you. What I didn't see was a woman going mach 5 and whipping into my drive to pull a U-turn. Or flip a bitch as we sometimes call it.
My neighbor's massive pine trees blocked her view of me. It was so damned close, inches of hitting each other. I was not speeding. Hard to believe but I normally don't gun it in the driveway. She, on the other hand,  was going way too fast for my driveway.
I can't even get out of the driveway without a problem. So my question is, can I write someone a speeding ticket in my driveway? I would be rich!
Spill what's your craziest driveway story?
Sonya Ann


Cheapchick said...

I got hit once by a woman doing a u-ey in the middle of the street. Her boyfriend acted as a witness for us because he couldn't believe what she had just done (plus they were pretty honest people). Dented in my front driver side bumper which their insurance had to replace. Fortunately, no one uses my driveway as a place to turn around, that would drive me bananas!

slugmama said...

My crazy driveway summarize it, a guy flipped his car and landed in my driveway and I saved his life. The end. Modest Sluggy.

mhart1993 said...

We lived in a townhouse for a few years, and our neighbors would always park in our driveway. One night I came home pretty late, and their car was parked all the way up to the garage door. So I blocked them in. About 8 am I heard them ringing the doorbell-I ignored it for at least 2 more hours. Oops-sorry you were late for work!

Elephant's Child said...

A childhood story. My mother pulled into her driveway at dusk. Got out of the car and walked round. And found a toddler asleep inches from her front wheel. She threw up, thinking of what could have happened. When she took the child home its mother said 'I wondered where he was....'

Practical Parsimony said...

Mine is an ongoing saga. I have lived here since 1977 and every one of my neighbors believes it is their god-given right to block my driveway. I have had to go slogging in the rain to get them to move the car. Of course, not only was I late for work, I was a mess from my soaked hair and clothes to my muddy shoes. They also have appliance vans that park in front of my driveway. When I need to get out, the person says to wait until the driver gets the whatever hooked up. If I am trying to get into my driveway, now my MO is to lay down on the horn until everyone on the block comes outside.

As for accidents,,,I was going to leave my driveway when a friend was here. "Don't hit my truck!" I assured him I could get around his truck. I got into my car and backed right into his truck. He didn't here the sound, so I went on my errand. He was asleep in the swing, so I didn't want to wake him. Finally, I remembered. He ran to his truck even though it was not damaged at all. Honest! It was an old truck!

Yes, I think you can give her a ticket or do a citizen's arrest.

Practical Parsimony said...


Anne in the kitchen said...

Well great, now I am the uncool kid once again. We pull in our driveway and we pull out. I have no interesting driveway stories at all. I am so boring!

Practical Parsimony said...

Upi can have my 27 years' worth of neighbors!

SAM said...

My daughter once (at 5) put our car in gear and rolled it down the driveway into the neighbors mailbox. We also live by a car dealer and their test runs seem to be to whip through our street and turn at cul de sac-fast.

Sonya Ann said...

Elephant's Child-That made me feel sick. I think I would have punched the mother. Sorry my American is showing again.

Elephant's Child said...

I think that mother DESERVED punching. Hard.